What a day!

I got up at 5AM to go to the gym. Call me crazy, but I do it every day. Well, most days. Okay, at least 4 times a week. Anyway, as I was on my way out the door Jason mumbled something about "be careful it may be icy". I went outside and there was stuff dripping off the roof so I figured the roads couldn't be too icy and I left. I worked out, came home, got the kids up and proceeded about my NORMAL day. Lauren trudged out of her room and said, "Mommy, my eye itches." I looked at her and instantly recoiled. Ugh! It was swollen, mucky and RED. Definitely pink eye. Okay, a little kink in my plans. I had a doctors appt at 10:30 and my doctor is in the same building as Lauren's pediatrician. I figured I would get Emily and Zach to school and take Lauren and Colbie with me to my appointment. On my way to take Emily to school I call the school to let them know that Lauren will not be there today. No answer. I try again. Again, no answer. As I pull up the the school I notice it is dark and there is no one there. Did I mention that I never turned on the TV to see if school was delayed or cancelled? Common sense told me that if I could drive on the road and not hit one patch of ice, there is no snow AND it is the middle of March that I shouldn't have to check the news to see if the kids had school. The girls school was delayed 2 hours and Zachary's school was cancelled completely. FOR RAIN!!! Ice was only predicted but I didn't see any.
Wow, at this point I am now home with three- strike that- four kids dressed and ready for school. It is only 8AM.
I called Lauren's doctor and they could see me at....drum roll please...yep...10:30! I think that all appointments in our family are scheduled Thursday at 10:30. I took it and called to reschedule my appointment.
I struck a deal with Laura, she took Zach and I dropped off her kids at school. Sounds like I got the better end of the deal.
I get to Laura's house and while she is showing me some dresses she made I heard an odd thud coming from the chair that I had put Colbie in. I look over and see that Colbie's car seat is upside down on the floor. "Oh no! She fell out of the chair!", I thought. But how did that happen? Upon closer inspection I noticed that there were a pair of little kid legs sticking out from under the car seat. It looked like the scene from The Wizard of OZ when Dorothy drops her house on the Wicked Witch of East...or is it West? Anyway, both Laura and I are just standing there staring at this pile because we were both perplexed as to what was going on. NO ONE WAS CRYING. It was dead silent. I immediately panicked because I realized that the legs belonged to Amy and she must have pulled Colbie's car seat with Colbie in it on top of herself. With no one crying I thought they were both unconscious. I yanked the car seat off of Amy and both her and Colbie were awake and alert. They were staring at each other in confusion. No one was hurt and I don't think either one of them understood what the heck just happened. It wasn't until I was in my car that I started laughing. Every time I picture the little legs sticking out I get the giggles.
On my way out the door Laura asked me if we call Colbie the "Colbinator 3000". I said yes, sometimes Lauren does. Weird nickname, I know. She said that she overheard someone (I won't say his name here but he is the only other one in our house with a penis besides Jason) tell Ian that Lauren calls Colbie the "Colbinator 3000". "Oh, that's cute", I said. She went on to tell me that he said, "Yeah, I call my penis the Peninator 3000!". Had it been anyone but Laura, I would have died. I asked her if she explained to him that naming your private parts is a little inappropriate and she said she did...after she suppressed her laughter.
I get up to the school to give them a note from Lauren's doctor and the vice principal said we may have to have a meeting to discuss Lauren's absences. "Are you serious?!?", I exclaimed. She said the state requires a meeting if the child is missing too much school...protocol...yada yada frickin' yada. I told her I would gladly send my child to school with strep, lice and pink eye if she would prefer. I was a little mean but I had had enough.
So here I sit, so tired. It has been a long day. It is only 1PM. Heaven help me...